This is a guest blog written by Axel Mason, one of four undergraduate Psychological Sciences students from the University of Newcastle, that ADHD Done Differently has the pleasure of working with as part of their Work Integrated Learning placement over term 1 and term 2 of 2024. As part of their placement, they have been investigating neurodiversity, ADHD, and evidence-based supports that will benefit parents/carers in raising their ADHDers.
The end of Highschool is a big change for everyone. You’re in the adult world now. You’re independent, and that can be both wonderful and daunting, especially for an ADHDer.
You might find out that university staff may not be as readily available to support you as school teachers (if you were lucky enough to experience this!) and workplaces have high expectations, with very little guidance. Without the skills and knowledge to access necessary accommodations, this transition can be overwhelming.
So why wait! Children are never too young to learn self-advocacy skills – and you as parents and carers can help them develop them!
ABOUT ME!
I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 20. I remember being afraid to tell my tutors at University that I was an ADHDer and that I needed extra support. I had never needed to advocate for myself before, so I spent two hard years struggling to keep up with everyone else, until my tutor pulled me aside and asked me why I hadn’t asked for an extension on an assessment that was a week late. After receiving accommodations from the University, my grades improved astronomically and I began to actually enjoy my work, I only wish I had done so sooner.
WHAT IS SELF-ADVOCACY?
At its core, self-advocacy is about learning to communicate your strengths and struggles, seeking support when necessary, and finding ways to manage your symptoms effectively. Individual self-advocacy is reliant on three main components:
Knowledge and awareness of self: This includes knowing one’s own preferences, needs, strengths, learning style, interests, and attributes of them – and their condition. This awareness allows us to identify areas of challenge and what accommondations we might need to thrive.
Knowledge of rights: This is knowledge of one’s rights afforded to them by law or other policies. This allows us to be aware of what supports and accommodations should be given to us, and if our rights are being neglected or violated.
Communication: Communication skills allow individuals to communicate their needs and advocate for the necessary supports, in an appropriate manner. Areas of particular importance include negotiation, persuasion, and problem solving. BUT: It is really important to note here that verbal communication (speaking) is NOT vital to be able to communicate your needs and advocate for yourself. There are MANY ways of communicating.
WHY IS IT IMPORTANT TO BUILD SELF-ADVOCACY IN OUR ADHD CHILDREN?
Research indicates that developing self-advocacy skills can have significant short and long-term benefits for ADHDers. Some of these key benefits are:
Improved confidence and self-esteem: By speaking up and advocating for themselves, children develop self-esteem and self-confidence. Through active participation in decision-making regarding their education, treatment, and life, ADHDers become more confident in their ability to traverse challenges(Roper, 2023).
Promoting Independence: For an ADHDer, self-advocacy is critical for developing independence and self-reliance. It allows ADHDers to navigate the world on their own. Greater self-advocacy has been shown to result in improved educational, financial, and social outcomes in adult life (Paradiz et al., 2018; Pfeifer et al., 2021; Roberts et al., 2014).
Reducing Stigma: ADHD remains very misunderstood by a lot of our society. By being able to openly discuss their experiences, ADHDers can foster a more supportive and understanding environment, be it in school, university, or work.
HOW CAN YOU, AS PARENTS/CARERS, PROMOTE SELF-ADVOCACY SKILLS IN YOUR CHILDREN?
Research indicates that developing self-advocacy skills can have significant short and long-term benefits for ADHDers. Some of these key benefits are:
Parental/Carer Advocacy: As parents and carers, you will be your child’s first advocate. Before they can advocate for themselves, you can work with teachers, coaches, and other people in their lives, to ensure that appropriate resources and accommodations are made available to support your child. You can demonstrate to your children how to actively engage with their support network (e.g. their immediate and extended family, other adults and friends) and to communicate openly about their needs and preferences. This could be as simple as asking your child’s teacher if they can have a fidget toy in the classroom, or ensuring your child is allowed regular breaks from class.
Educate and Empower: You can start by having an age-appropriate discussion with your children about ADHD. Assure them that ADHD has nothing to do with intelligence or competency and that they understand how their ADHD brains work, their strengths and their potential challenges, as well as strategies available for managing those challenges. As they grow, empower them to take an active role in their ADHD journey by involving them in discussions about treatment options, coping mechanisms, and self-care strategies.
Encourage Self-Awareness: You can help your child to grow a sense of self-awareness by encouraging reflection and introspection. Try asking them what they like and what they’re good at to identify their strengths, challenges, interests, and goals. Encourage them to talk about how their ADHD affects their daily lives to help them to recognize their own triggers, symptoms, and coping strategies. These kinds of discussions can be challenging, especially when children are young, so you can also begin modelling this at home (e.g. I am feeling really overwhelmed at the moment. I am going to be kind to myself and make a cup of tea!!”) If you’re struggling with this, seeing a clinical psychologist with your child can facilitate these conversations and help you navigate these topics.
Promote Effective Communication: You can help your child develop effective communication skills – remembering that this does not have to be verbal communication (speaking!) Ensuring they have a robust communication system is key. Try discussing and role-playing scenarios based on challenges they may face such as requesting help at school, or explaining their ADHD to classmates, allows children to practice communicating and advocating for themselves in a safe and supportive environment. Like self-awareness, this can be a difficult task and speech pathologists can be a great support if your child is experiences challenges with communication.
Opportunities for Decision-Making: The right, ability, and confidence to make decisions about one’s own life are the heart of self-advocacy. Giving your child opportunities to participate in decision-making and take ownership of their choices is the start of self-advocacy. Start with simple decisions such as how to wear their hair, what clothes to wear, what to have for dinner, which will help them make more life changing decisions like choosing after school activities, what supports they needs at school, or managing their time. By empowering them to make decisions, children can begin to develop independence and self-advocacy skills.
Final Thoughts/Where to start:
For me, self-advocacy is about being recognised as capable of determining my own life choices and being viewed as valuable as everyone else, not despite my condition, but because of my own unique qualities. As parents of ADHDers, you know you’re children, you know they’re just as capable as any other child, but others may not hold these same views. You can advocate for them and help change these views, but through self-advocacy, your child can become the best proof that ADHD is not a deficit.
Implementing these blog suggestions can support your child’s development of self-advocacy skills, though they can be a little overwhelming to implement all at once. Big changes don’t happen overnight, and you should take them one step at a time.
A good start could be to ask them to make decision. It can be as simple or complex as you feel they’re ready for. Discuss the pros and cons with them, make sure they’re well informed, but leave the choice to them. They may make a decision you disagree with, but, as long as it’s safe, it’s their choice. One they get to take ownership and responsibility for, starting their path to better self-advocacy and a brighter future
References
Paradiz, V., Kelso, S., Nelson, A., & Earl, A. (2018). Essential Self-Advocacy and Transition. Pediatrics, 141(Supplement 4), S373–S377. https://doi.org/10.1542/peds.2016-4300p
Pfeifer, M. A., Reiter, E. M., Cordero, J. J., & Stanton, J. D. (2021). Inside and Out: Factors That Support and Hinder the Self-Advocacy of Undergraduates with ADHD and/or Specific Learning Disabilities in STEM. CBE—Life Sciences Education, 20(2), ar17. https://doi.org/10.1187/cbe.20-06-0107
Roberts, E. L., Ju, S., & Zhang, D. (2014). Review of Practices That Promote Self-Advocacy for Students With Disabilities. Journal of Disability Policy Studies, 26(4), 209–220. https://doi.org/10.1177/1044207314540213
Roper, L. D. (2023). How self-advocacy strategies help students with “invisible disabilities” flourish beyond high school. Journal of Human Behavior in the Social Environment, 1–28. https://doi.org/10.1080/10911359.2023.2251554